Transcript
Thinking positively is making a positive interpretation of what’s happening. So actively choosing to focus on the positive and you can still be totally realistic about what’s happening. Let’s say sometimes we fuck up. If you think negatively, you wallow in failure and it will impact your self-confidence and you will feel bad about yourself. If you think positively, you can say, okay, this was not great, but how can I learn from this? How can I make it better? So then you really ensure you get the nugget from this failure.
Think about salary negotiation. Most people will think “Oh, this is gonna be difficult”. Or they will think something along the lines of “I will be perceived as greedy and unpleasant”. And that’s not really helping self-confidence because eventually, you will maybe even avoid the situation. But when you reframe it and you say, okay, what is a negotiation? It really is an opportunity to create a better outcome. Or you could say instead of being perceived as unpleasant that you will be perceived as knowing what you want. Having business savvy and being a strong negotiator. So then all of a sudden, if you have the positive frame, you feel more encouraged and essentially confident to enter that situation.
Notice when you think negatively and then your job really is to find [the] alternative positive interpretation of what’s happening. So let’s say someone is not getting back to you. It could be a potential client, it could be a date even, and then you could say “Oh, that person is just not interested in me”. Or you could go and look for alternatives, for instance, an alternative interpretation could be “Oh, could it be that the person is really, really busy and therefore needs a bit more time to get back to me?” Or could it be that the person wanted to respond but forgot, and then you just decide to approach them once more and see what’s actually true.