Transcript
If somebody leaves his or her comfort zone or not, it’s a decision. If you want to grow and want to be fulfilled in life, it’s necessary to leave it sometimes. I know a couple of people who never leave the comfort zone and they are fine with it. I’m not sure if they are really fine, those people wouldn’t talk about their problems so easily. I think growth is a need like a plant. We also have this. We want to grow something in us. No matter if we want it or we don’t want, we want to grow. If we deny this need, this requirement to grow one starts to suffer maybe from depression. I have this experience as well, maybe physical disease. So the energy of growth when you don’t invest it into your growth, in leaving your comfort zone, it will direct itself against yourself against your body, against your psyche like an enemy. So physical diseases, depression, maybe accidents, life will wake you up in a way. I experienced this myself. When I was 37, I went into a horrible burnout. And looking back at these Melba signs before: change, change your work, do something else, leave this relationship. I didn’t do. I didn’t leave this secure, safe thing that was not comfortable because sometimes the comfort zone can be very uncomfortable, but you’re used to it, your habit. So you don’t know what comes afterwards, so you better keep it.
Many people living like this, but to be a healthy human being, a fulfilled human being, I think it’s really necessary to leave the comfort zone from time to time to feel it. Now it’s time to grow. Now it’s time to leave. Now it’s time to change. And this is exactly the topic of my coaching.
In my life, I left my comfort zone many times. You know, some people feel well in the comfort zone and they don’t want to leave it. And for me, it’s a bit different always when I stayed for too long in a comfort zone, I got depressed or I got sick. So I wanted to leave. So what makes you, what enables you to leave it? I think being in touch with your own desires with your own vision, to know what makes me happy, what do I need in my life? Even if you don’t understand this, that helps to leave your comfort zone. Many people don’t dare to do this. So you need time for yourself. You need time to reflect. You need good people around you who encourage you, who can see you clearly, acknowledge who you are. This is also helping. That’s encouraging to leave a safe situation for an adventure. And sometimes what you feel, it’s not so comfortable.
For instance, me, I had such a longing for Middle Eastern countries. I didn’t understand why, but I thought, okay, it’s there. So I followed it. I did. So I lived for six years. And Palestine lived and worked in Palestine. And it was the most amazing time in my life. You need to have the courage to take yourself serious, especially your emotions. And then there is something connected to your intuition. And there’s something else you can practice to leave your comfort zone each and every day. So when I knew I would go to Palestine, I knew this is not a comfort zone and that I have had to make myself fit for this. So I established routines.
I practised to leave my comfort zone every morning, I get up, not later than six, I take an ice-cold shower. I do my one-hour meditation and some yoga. I leave this comfort zone. That might sound a little bit tough. You can do smaller things. So practice, as often as you can to do things differently, then it is comfortable for you. Try to fast for one day or try to talk to this person in the street. You don’t know what you find interesting. So go for a little micro-adventures in your everyday life that are not so comfortable in the first place, but this way you can practice to make [making] being a bit uncomfortable a common thing. Leaving a comfort zone doesn’t need to be the big step to leave everything audit to do, the big thing, it starts with little small things and one can practice this.
My coaching business was what I wished to do, but it still is very uncomfortable. And it’s leaving my comfort zone in a very harsh way in the first place. The most difficult thing for me is showing up in the world, showing up on social media, making a video, posting a picture of myself, posting a blog post. To be honest, when I did this the first time I almost threw up when I pushed the bottom from shame, from feeling not being good enough, maybe people judge me, whatever. It still is difficult. But then I challenged myself. I said, okay, I do this now three times a week. No matter if I have something interesting or not, I just do it. I don’t question it. And it is still not the most comfortable thing to do, but the more I do it, the better I feel about it. So I think the more you do these things and in my case now showing up in social media and also in public life, the more you do it, the more comfortable it will be. And in this way you establish your new comfort zone. This is the way I deal with this. Being uncomfortable. Doing it anyway. Even if you feel a lack of confidence or shame or whatever, but then going again and again, and again, I challenged myself. It’s quite okay to show up, to be seen.